Unite!

You are probably wondering why I have called this meeting: It is to clarify the number one goal of our kind.

This behavior of our people must be stopped! I know we have been
quite effective in slowing it down, but the time has come for victory.

When they have a book you must, at all costs, stop it before it begins. Put your head between the book and their eyes. Bump the back of the book. Lie down and squirm  your way up their chest until you are nose to nose. Yowl. Kneed firmly, until they yowl.

When the newspaper comes in, make sure you perch, lie, kneed, etc. upon the paper. Don't give it up! If they start to jerk it out from under you, strike! Use the claws, use the teeth to nip. Don't give in easily.

And this new thing: most of them fondly call it "Kindle". They do not want you near it because it is "electronic". So knock if off the nightstand. Chew the recharging cord in two. Mark it with your saliva. Sit on it, stand on it, whatever you can possibly do.

You will know your success by the people's screeches. This is their sound that tells you a job has been well done.

Do not let our kind down.

The future belongs to us.