Let me say upfront and unequivocally, I, without a shadow of a doubt, HATE self-flushing toilets.
No matter how much you are like a stealth jet pilot, slowing standing up, it flushes.
You don't stand a chance. You can't escape it. And some of them flush so big they splatter your bareness because you simply can't move fast enough what with your Levi's around your ankles and all.
And if you ain't fast enough, that sucker will flush again before you can get the heck out of Dodge.
The best practical advise I have ever given Daughter was to always be standing up, pulled up, buttoned up, zipped up and belted up before you flush down in a public restaurant.
That's because, whether you've ever had this happen, public toilets are prone to overflow.
And if it hasn't happened to you yet, it will. It will.
And just how fast do you think you can get away from an overflowing toilet that is pouring out it's contents in a rapid fashion, if your Levi's are still you know where?
Good, solid, practical advise. Free to all who would have listened.
Wasted.
So join me in a toast to start a rebel stance against this horrible change in our society.
Let us hereby vow to never use another self flushing toilet as long as we all shall live!
Bottoms up!
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