Another Year, Another Christmas Pageant

I have to admit, this year's started out a little slow. There was a lot of "down" time with kids standing around waiting on something -a cue,  maybe.

Finally, with the very first song we had some action. A  melt down by a nearly three year old. Nobody could figure out why, but he began to cry loudly and jump up and down. Mama came to the rescue and rushed him out the side door. 

At the end of the song, a little boy of around seven came off the stage crying. Never knew what that was about, either.

Gabriel had a solo. The words were being shown on a screen at the back of the church, but apparently the wrong verses were being put up at the wrong time. Old Gabe got the giggles, and finally said, "Those are the wrong words."  The finish was strong, though, with lots of applause.

The innkeeper was a regular comedian. Who knew? This kid is as quiet as they come. When Joseph asked if he had somewhere they could stay, the innkeeper looked coyly to the side and said, "No." which made the audience laugh because it sounded like "New." Then Joseph asked was he sure there wasn't any place they could stay, the innkeeper said, "We-ll, let me look around." Which he did, by turning his head up down, and back. More laughter from the audience. "We-ll," says he, "There is the stable."

Thank goodness!

In the middle of "O Holy Night", the little donkey appeared from stage right and began to wander around. The soloist was stage left, so my attention was split. Because the cow showed up, too. And, not be be outdone, the sheep showed up. The sheep is about the size of a one year old, and when she tried to navigate the first step, I thought she was a goner. But she flailed her arms, er, front legs, wildly and regained her balance. 

All the while, the soloist, either oblivious to the goings on at the opposite end of the stage, or a great actress, sang on. 

The stage began to fill up with the shepherds, the wise men, Mary and Joseph, the baby Jesus, all the angels, big and small. The animals were corralled and placed on their proper mark. 

As the soloist began her cresendo,  four or five of the littlest angels boogied on down. 

The End 

Another Christmas, Another Pageant

Yesterday was the most chaotic, pew filled, mistake ridden, guffawing inducing Sunday of the year: the annual Christmas Pageant.

I salute those brave enough to "direct" (and boy do I use that term loosely) a Christmas Pageant. Holy cow!

There are costumes. And because the same ones are used over and over, usually a costume is way too big, way too short, dragging the floor, etc.

This year the angel wings are looking a little peaked.

One of the narrators came down with a cough, so naturally some idiot  brave soul took up the job and stumbled right through it admirably.

The hand bell choir played. The little ones took their time. I had to look at the program to discover they were dinging out "Go Tell It On The Mountain". The older kids played another song and the boys kept freezing and not dinging at all. Then, when enough time went by for intermission before one boy realized it was his turn to ding, they got tickled, and the whole audience laughed.

The shepherds were older and well behaved. They came in stately with their staffs and stood quietly the whole time.

But of course, the real show starts when the little ones show up as angels to surround Baby Jesus. One little red headed angel kept getting her pony tail yanked by a baby angel who was in the arms of a teenage angel standing behind  her. She was stoic about it.

The littlest angel had apparently decided that everyone else might have bare feet or white tights covering their soles, but she was sticking with her black shiny rain boots, thank you very much.  She also wandered around a lot, once scooting in between Mary and Joseph and patting Joseph on the leg, perhaps in sympathy because Baby Jesus would not be still.

In fact, Baby Jesus loved the feed trough He (really she) was in. When the wise men delivered the gold, frankincense and myrrh, and placed them in the front of the trough, Baby Jesus spotted the gifts right off, and He wanted His stuff, man....and rightly so.

It was pretty much downhill from there as far as keeping Baby Jesus still. So Mary took Him out and placed Him by her, but He quickly decided crawling off was a wonderful idea...so she grabbed Him by his gown tail. I will say He was excellently behaved vocally...no crying He made.

The Wise Men got distracted a few times while the Angels were singing, and must have cracked a joke, because they were yukking it up stage left.

And the little angels had no desire to join hands and dance in a circle like the bigger angels were instructing them to do. 

I think there was a problem with the sound system too, because sometimes there was almost unbearable silence between songs. The soloists would start getting antsy, starring out into the audience like the old deer caught in the headlights. But the music would finally come on. One of the soloing angels sighed heavily into the mic before she was finally able to perform.

Our brand new pastor got up and said a few words, mainly that this was his first day and all he had to do was pray and eat.  Sounds like the kind of job I'd be perfect for!

All in all, the most I can say about the whole thing is this:

It was perfect.