The Good Life

This morning Husband and I sat on our back porch, way up in the trees. We have a tin roof, and it was coming one of those gentle rains that truly does pitter patter on the leaves.

This didn't bother the birds one bit, we could hear several different chatters, songs and calls. The Ruby-Throated Humming Bird drank hungrily from the feeder, then sat right at our faces and shook water off himself. 

The seed feeder had nut hatches, tufted titmouse(s? mice?) and Mrs. Indigo Bunting, who unlike her royal blue husband is two shades of plain old brown. 

There was some squabbling at the feeder, because no one wanted to share, but it was entertaining to us and the cats.

Bonnie, or Dog, had ferociously run off a squirrel earlier. The squirrel had managed to open the top of the feeder and dive in head first. Since the feeder is right close to the screen, he had quite a fright when an 84 pound bulldog came racing out of the house, growling and barking, every  hair turned the wrong way. What a dog!

Husband,birds, rain, pets, perfect temperature, pleasant conversation. Oh, and coffee.

On a beautiful Friday morning, on this Earth, who could ask for anything better?

A big thanks to the Creator for this gift.

Amen.

It Ain't The Heat, It's The Humility (Yogi Berra)

Lord, ain't it hot?

The other day it was up in the nineties (I know, I know, it's been that way for many days), but on this day, I called up the weather feller and he said the heat index read 103 degrees.

Now, I don't know what how the heat index is formulated, nor do I need to know. But I'm sure there's some proud mama out there saying, "Ya'll know that's my  young'un that thought that up, don't you?"

It's so hot my porch plants sent me a message via e-mail begging to be watered a day early.

It's so hot the cats came in off the back porch and slammed the door behind them, headed toward the air conditioning.

It's so hot... eh, never mind.

All I got to say: Those of you who hate snow, shame on you.

Shame, shame, shame - on you.

Extra! Extra! Read All About It!

If you are like me, it's becoming almost unbearable to watch news or read headlines.

But occasionally, I see something in the corner of my eye; I can't resist it, and I read. 

Well, by golly, if I read it, so can you.

Example 1: A man in China was sold two puppies from a guy who told him they would grow into being fine guard dogs. The fellow who purchased the animals said he couldn't keep them fed enough, they were constantly hungry and costing him a great deal of money. As they grew bigger, bigger, and still bigger, he either consulted someone or perhaps someone visited - briefly - but long enough to tell them those weren't dogs, they were bears.

Example 2: I only read the headline because really; I just couldn't bring myself to read the rest:  "Chattanooga attorney shot while breaking into elderly couple's home and throwing house plans at them".

Yeah. That's what I thought, too.  

Later, dudes and dudettes.

It's Been a Long Time Since Ding Dong School

I was cooking dinner and Husband was helping. He was to get the sweet potatoes out of the vegetable bin. He came back with two that had lots of stems growing from their eyes. 

He asked if he could put one in water and grow a 'sweet potater vine'.

I said, "Don't you just cut off one of the thingies and put that in water? Why waste a whole potato?"

We didn't know. We couldn't remember.

It's been a long time since Ding Dong School.

I have very vague memories of it. I looked it up, and it ran from 1952 to 1956, which means I was two years old when it went off the air. 

And something else: I remember Miss Frances as being a young, dark headed, slender woman. 

The one I saw on youtube is a matronly, grey headed woman. So, who the heck am I thinking about? (Husband later says I'm thinking of the woman from Romper Room. Oh.)

The only other thing I remember about Ding Dong School was her showing us how to grow a sweet potato vine in the kitchen window; which, with the help of Mother, I did.

I think there was even a children's book about it, and I owned it. * added: (There was, I looked it up.)

OH LOOK! THE BOOK!

That's why I told Husband to look up Ding Dong School and find out the right way to do it.

I wonder if he will, or he'll just cave and eat the tater.

Time will tell.

Shave and a Hair Cut, Two Bits

You know, you really are never too old to learn something.

I get that. But sometimes I learn something and people act like I should have known all along - everyone else already knows.

I did not know women shave their faces.

Apparently it's a very normal, casual thing.

The first time I heard about it was a few years ago from a young lady. We were about to be on television and were having a conversation about make up. She said she shaves her face anytime she is having a photo taken because it makes make up go on much smoother. She learned this from a friend who is a model. Models, apparently, shave their face regularly when they are working.

Then a hair dresser friend told me she had started shaving her face in her fifties because of (you'll be surprised) facial hair. Okay, you weren't surprised.

No pain, no waxing, no tweezing. And no, apparently the hair doesn't grow back so that you look like a lumberjack.

Then another hairdresser told me the same thing.

There are more women that have told me that than this, but I'm afraid my mind boggled.

Now, I've never been very hairy. Even eyebrows are pretty scarce. So facial hair has never been a concern. But the last few years my peach fuzz on my cheeks are fuzzier and we won't mention "old lady hairs" as one of my friend's so fondly calls them.

So. I'm gonna bite the bullet.

Next time you see me, if I have a little piece of toilet paper stuck to my cheek, think nothing of it.

I'm just being one of the guys.

Sports Nuts

I pay no attention whatsoever to sports. The only time I am even mildly interested is when the Dawgs play Tech. and I want to know who wins at the end.

Having said that, yesterday left me drained and amazed when  I was presented with an event that was right in front of me.

Daughter and I were in Buffalo Luke's eating the best chicken sandwich I have ever eaten in my life (except for the other one I had there previously) and fresh, cut and cooked-right-there french fries. 

I need to take a moment.

Anywho, they have TV's everywhere, so right at our table was one, with a sports event just beginning. I couldn't figure out what it was at first, because they didn't have the sound on.

It was all guys (and you'll understand why in a moment); and at first they looked pretty athletic. Then this old man came down the walk. Indeed they said he was the oldest man ever to enter the competition. He was 72 and was five six at 115 pounds. I found myself hoping he didn't get crushed by the others.

Then there were some pretty fat fellas.

They were all dressed differently from one another, but each guy's theme was red, white and blue. They each had a cheerleader, too.

The competitors all lined up behind this long table. The cameras focused mainly on the champ who had broken a world's record of 73 and 1/2.

He ate 73 and 1/2 hot dogs in ten minutes.

They started the contest. It really was like a train wreck as far as  not wanting to look but unable to stop.

My own food dangled somewhere between the plate and my mouth. 

It was so very, very, gross.

He didn't beat his own record, he only got seventy hot dogs eaten. In ten minutes, people.

You understand why it was all males in this competition? 

I thought so.